


A New World Here Waiting Just For Us

by sunshinejade



Category: X1 (Korea Band)
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Alternate Universe - High School, Dad Hangyul, Dad Seungyoun, Family Drama, High School Ex, Marriage, Multi, Single Parents, Step-Brothers, Step-Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-13
Updated: 2020-01-13
Packaged: 2020-10-17 22:56:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 16,313
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20628914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunshinejade/pseuds/sunshinejade
Summary: Two past lovers meet again after twenty years and in no time they find that their love is just as deep as it was in high school.No matter how much they love one another the new family will have to realize it's not as easy as it sounds.Dohyon will have to get used to a new life and a new city. Hyeongjun will have to get used to his childhood home being invaded by strangers. Seungyoun will have to face the fact that 'i still love you' doesn't mean 'i only ever loved you'. Hangyul will have to face that he and Seungyoun have different views on parenting.DISCONTINUED





	1. Characters Introduction

**Author's Note:**

> This fan-fiction is loosely based on Italian tv series I Cesaroni (based on soap opera Los Serranos).  
ORIGINAL PLOT - that will be slightly modified.  
Newly divorcee comes back to home town and meets, after twenty years, high-school flame who is now widowed. They fall in love again, decide to marry and join their families. The families have difficulties getting used to each other and getting along. One of the many reasons the enlarged family has problems? The kids start falling for each other.
> 
> I’m not sure when or with what frequency I’ll be able to update this, but I got really attached to the plot.

Aged up hyung line + Seungwoo is the same age as the 96-line// regular age maknae line. to make the plot smoother Hyung line is all from Busan

* * *

**Cho Family** \- the out of your league Seoulites:

  * Cho Seungyoun (39) - confident gay  
\- Music producer  
\- Dohyon’s dad.  
\- Silly, chill and extremely acculturated, embodiment/gay version of ‘the cool mom’.  
\- Spoils Dohyon to death and although he seems carefree and wild he is actually extremely overprotective.  
\- Swings between being extremely romanticist to extremely cynical due to believing in love, yet being single at 39  
(told Dohyon he only ever fell in love once, never said with who). 

Left Busan right after high school, even if it meant leaving behind his life (including high school boyfriend) to pursue his dream in the producing field in Seoul, succeeded and is a freelancer now as well as leisurely rich now to not be worried of having a regular job.  
Had Dohyon at 25 after a drunken night, never thought of him as a mistake, just a blessing in disguise.  
His return in the neighborhood is the talk of half of the town, he was famous for leaving and achieving the big city life as well as being everyone’s first love in high school due to his chic vibe.

  * Cho Dohyon (14) - panicked gay/bi  
\- Musical and academic genius, being his father’s (and mother’s) son  
\- Grew up with music and plays various instruments as well as being great at producing.  
Actually is his father's helping hand and had a go at producing some of his newest tracks.  
\- He is extremely shy and gets flustered easily  
\- Hates to admit it but is a spoiled only son.

He only wants his father’s happiness and halfheartedly agreed on moving because Seungyoun seemed so excited about it. He still thinks it’s a hustle but only ever complains in front of his mother because his dad would feel bad about it.  
Never felt snobbish and is very easygoing but being raised in Seoul he feels the difference of now living in Busan’s suburbs.  
Misses life in Seoul mostly because he knows no one and because it took him literally 14 years to get used to how he lived.  
He has problems making new friends both for his temperament and because he’s the kind to strive to be the best (genius baby, everyone) after a while opens up and finds out he has a flair for mischief and is cunning enough to never get caught. Have I mentioned that even if he’s a good kid, he’s actually really spoiled?

  * Park Jimin (38) het  
\- Singer and songwriter, Dohyon’s mom.

Had Dohyon at 24, she was planning on aborting because she got pregnant after drunkenly sleeping with her (gay) best friend once.  
Seungyoun begged her on his knees for a whole week crying and promised to always be by her side and pay for everything she might need. In the nine months of pregnancy, she actually fell in love with her baby but has no problem admitting to being the second favorite since Dohyon lives with Seungyoun and was raised mostly by him.  
She’s a busy working woman, loving yes, but very busy. Because she travels a lot she’s unable to let Dohyon live with her as he would like (instead of moving).  
Talked her son into moving, even if it means leaving his life behind, but is secretly very sad to see both of them go, Dohyon visits her in Seoul whenever he wants/she can.

**Lee Family** \- the down to earth Busan bunch:

  * Lee Hangyul (36) confident bi  
\- Taekwondo instructor and Dance Teacher and co-owner of the gym he teaches in,  
\- Supervisor of the school’s dance crew  
\- Hyeongjun’s dad.  
\- Widow of 5 years.  
\- Loving, loyal, warm, funny, (extremely attractive) and renown in the suburb to be the dream family man.  
\- Is the chill dad  
\- The Dumb in _Dumb and Dumber_

Met his wife at 17, had Hyeongjun at 20 (people think it was a shotgun wedding due to how young Hangyul is, but he and Hayoung married at 19 out of pure love). God help anyone who disrespects people he cares for. He is the Dance Team /Taekwondo version of the Soccer Mom.  
Reason #1 all women (and men) want to be the next Mrs./Mr. Lee. Lets Hyeongjun do whatever he feels like doing as long as he asks for permission, knows what he’s getting into and has relatively good grades, school presence and doesn’t get in trouble (caught).  
If Hyeongjun misses any of those rules, he turns into a monster dad.

  * Lee Hyeongjun (16) bi -> confident bi  
\- Happy go lucky, kid.  
\- Grew up dancing because of his parents and it’s literally his only dream and priority.  
\- Loves his parents intensely  
\- Leader vibes  
\- Goblin #1

Grew up with a ‘what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger’ attitude when it comes to anything physical (Hayoung and Hangyul as parents, guys) and at the same time he was raised to be true to his emotions and feelings making him wear his heart on his sleeves (and kind of a cry baby, too).  
Cherishes his mom’s memory and is the only one allowed to talk about her (only one who also manages to make his dad think about her without feeling the pain). He’s part of the school’s dance crew (Class X) and now that Hyunsuk graduated he’s the new leader, even if he’s only a junior.  
Not particularly great in school, enough to keep Hangyul happy (and his girlfriend proud).  
Best friends with the dean’s son, which kinda gives them a free pass from detention.  
Everyone was heartbroken because the school resident (bi) cutie pie got a s/o. Reason #2 all men and women wanna be the next Mr/s Lee.

  * Song Hayoung (deceased) het

Was literally the best wife and mother in the world, raised her son on kindness, acoustic lullabies and hip hop.  
There’s always a warm, homely, loving light in the Lee residence and most people think it’s her shining on her family from above, but there are times her memory feels more like a shadow.  
She was Hangyul’s second love and he thought he’d never love anyone besides Hyeongjun after her death.

  * (BONUS) Beak Jiheon (15) confident het  
\- Cheerleader  
\- Brainiac  
\- Hapkido athlete  
\- Hyeongjun's gf  
\- Ambitious and passionate.  
\- She is extremely bubbly and easy-going unlike what her achievements make her sound.

Daughter of Lee Saerom and Back Jin. Nothing she can’t do/isn’t already doing. The main-flyer of the cheerleading squad even though she’s only a sophomore, she’s the most likely to become the next cheer captain, plays guitar, is in drama club (even if only as a supporting actress due to time management) and does Hapkido. Positively enjoys studying and is the first of her year, aiming for valedictorian when she gets in her senior year. Enjoys dances for fun, the past winter she would sometimes rent a practice room in Yohangyul’s gym with her friends. She became ‘friends’ with Hyeongjun and soon they got together. After they started dating she changed gym for Hapkido practice in order to have more time with Hyeongjun.

**Han Family** \- the all time friends:

  * Han Seungwoo (39) confident gay  
\- Busan International High School’s Dean  
\- Dongpyo’s dad  
\- Seungyoun’s high school best friend.

Teaches philosophy and offers free vocal training to the members of the glee club on the weekends.  
Has missed having a best friend, specially with his husband being attached to the hip to his best friend. Caring, but very strict. Isn’t afraid of scolding or embarrassing Dongpyo or Hyeongjun in front of everyone but clearly has a soft spot for them anyways.  
Still calls Dongpyo his sweet baby boy, both because it’s true and because it annoys Dongpyo.  
Loves his husband unconditionally, even when he’s dumb.

  * Kim Yohan (36) panicked gay (even as a married man)  
\- National Athlete and Taekwondo instructor and co-owner of the gym with Hangyul.  
\- Hangyul’s best friend since high school.  
\- the Dumber in _Dumb and Dumber_

Invented whipped culture and has been with Seungwoo since (his) senior year (everyone was surprised that the panicked gay kid managed to seduce the sexy uni student), he and Hangyul are dumb and dumber and thanks god Dongpyo and Hyeongjun seem to be as close as they are.  
Gets in trouble a lot and has Seungwoo get him out of it. Giggles a lot and even Dongpyo says he’s still 15 at heart.  
He’s the fun dad that means the best but sucks at giving advice.  
Lowkey feels he doesn’t deserve Seungwoo and lives to make him and their son happy.

  * Han Dongpyo (16) pansexual  
\- Glee club president (takes it very seriously)  
\- Hyeongjun’s best friend since birth.  
\- Bubbly and cute, but mostly sassy and tired of people’s BS.  
\- Goblin #2

IVF kid, his biological dad is Seungwoo, which means he’s very keen on showing pops Yohan that it doesn’t matter and that he loves him.  
Because of that, he’s not sure if he can ask his dads whose womb was used to conceive him (he’s not calling her mom, he doesn’t need a mom - he already has two great dads) Also takes dance class with Hyeongjun (Hangyul teaches) in the weekends because it was either that or Taekwondo.  
Barely passing classes because he’s more interested in the social aspect of high school and he’s actually extremely smart.  
Goes to his dad if he’s in trouble, goes to his pops if he feels like causing trouble.

**Kim Family** \- the almost always friendly neighbors:

  * Kim Wooseok (39) confident bi  
\- Owns an art gallery / cafe next to the Yohangyul Gym  
\- also lives on the other side of the road.  
\- Looks like he’s the chick, artsy guy from out of town  
\- actually easy to bully and tease.  
\- tsundere?

Sometimes gets dragged into Yohangyul shenanigans because they work next to each other (and in Hangyul case they’re neighbours too).  
Has a tsundere personality but only with his husband, always picks a fight with him but is actually very submissive and compliant.  
Gets along with Seungyoun because they have a lot of things in common and because he too moved to Busan to find inspiration and ended up finding love.  
Don’t touch or mock his kids, only he gets to do that.

  * Kim Minhee (16) panicked het  
\- Classmate with Hyeongjun and Dongpyo  
\- in the Drama club but just for fun.  
\- Wooseok’s first-born from a previous marriage.

His mom is his role model even if he barely remembers her (was a surgeon, died in a car crash when Minhee was five).  
Only cares about scientific subjects because he wants to be a doctor, kinda sucks at the humanistic subjects and Dongpyo says it’s because he’s actually an alien that can’t cope with human behaviour.  
Rumors has it he and the other two were enemies in middle school, but Minhee started taking a dance class with Hangyul a few years back and now they’re all friends.

  * Lee Jinhyuk (39) confident gay  
\- Accounts manager for a huge multinational, so high in the company that he actually can afford a lot of free time or working from home  
\- president of the Parents Committee.  
\- over-protective dad  
\- whipped husband (as much as Yohan for Seungwoo)

Actually gets along with both Yohan and Hangyul, sometimes has beef over school stuff with Seungwoo because Jinhyuk gets very anxious over his children’s education, other than that they’re fine.  
Has one-sided hatred for Seungyoun, because he remembers how popular he used to be, recognises how cool he is now and doesn’t like how close he became with Wooseok (Seungyoun tends to sound very flirty at times).  
First priority: Jinwoo’s future and dreams. Second priority: Minhee’s future and dreams.  
At first, didn’t like Minhee hanging out with HJ and DP because he thought they were bad influences (it’s actually the other way around)  
Hangyul bonds with him because they both get jealous over little things sometimes and it turns out Jinhyuk is actually really chill.

  * Lee Jinwoo (14) panicked het  
\- Freshman like Dohyon, super shy and awkward

Adopted at 7, one year after Wooseok and Jinhyuk married, but he knew Jinhyuk since he was 4 because the man came across the orphanage (clients or something) through work and became fond of the little boy.  
Became friends with Dohyon because they sat next to each other at the presentation on the first day of school.  
His fathers’ over-protectiveness (mostly Jinhyuk) stopped him from ever developing a proper backbone and that’s bad.  
He wants to try to become more Jinwoo and less Wooseok and Jinhyuk’s baby.


	2. PROLOGUE - SEUNGYOUN

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seungyoun is feeling homesick and goes back.  
He meets old acquaintances that take him back.

_It was dead long ago but it's all coming back to me _  
_It's so hard to resist and it's all coming back to me _  
_I can barely recall _  
_But it's all coming back to me _now.

* * *

PROLOGUE

Seungyoun smells Busan before even seeing the city.  
It’s something so distinctive and special to him that he has made it his own personal tradition to always have the windows down when he’s nearing the destination, regardless of how noisy the strong wind can get.

This time, the third since the beginning of the year, is the first time he comes south by train, usually preferring to drive himself.  
He’s lucky enough that the wagon is empty so no one can complain when he shoves the small, dusty window down to enjoy the fresh breeze.   
Fresh, he realizes, is not the word he should use.

The chilling air of the late February morning barely reaches 7°C even in the south which feels invigorating to his slightly anxious face.

He’s been traveling up and down the country a lot, always looking for new places to use as inspiration and most times he drags Dohyon along, but never if he’s planning to go back to Busan.   
Then again he never visited Busan much, in the past.

With his beloved parents, God bless their souls, six feet under he only ever went there once a year, to pay them a visit on what would be their wedding anniversary and it was never the sort of thing he deemed enjoyable for his son, so Dohyon has never actually stepped foot in his father’s hometown.

Seungyoun has a feeling, down in his belly, that it’ll soon change.   
There’s something about being in Seoul that has started to feel foreign to him and at the same time so monotonous.

The charming city he had given up everything for had suddenly lost his spark and hearing a man on the phone on New Year's Eve, talking in a strong satori had filled him with determination to visit his birthplace again.   
When the following week, Jimin asked for permission to take their son away for the weekend to go skiing in Japan, he gladly gave them his blessings and packed up to leave and visit the winter south sea on his own.

The experience had overwhelmed him with memories and thoughts about his younger years and suddenly he was on a journey to the past.  
The second time was actually less than a month previous to now, he just had the worst day at the studio, staring into nothing and not composing anything at all. Not even failed attempts or bad songs, no completely nothing.

Dohyon was already sleeping when he got back home that night, and after making sure that Jimin was free to intervene had anything happened, he had texted their maid to have his son’s lunchbox ready before he left for school, he took the car and left before daylight. He was back before dinner with three boxes of seed-stuffed pancakes, one for him, one for Dohyon and one for Jimin.

But today is different because it’s the first time that he actually has someone waiting for him.

He doesn’t know what possessed him earlier in the week to actually reach out to a certain someone he knew never left Busan.   
They didn’t really catch up, both finding it extremely awkward to talk of where they’ve gone with their lives over the phone, but in less then fifteen minutes Seungyoun had made plans to go back to the southern city for the weekend, the sweet voice over the phone telling him he would come to pick him up at the station and that he was free to stay over to sleep.

That’s how Seungyoun finds himself in the middle of Busan Station, looking left and right to find a black bowl cut and wide shoulders. It doesn’t take him that much to see among the crowd a loopy grin that somehow still manages to make the man attractive.

He’s about to call out, but apparently the other saw him too and it’s strange to think that they felt like strangers over the phone because now he actually feels like he never left the city all those years ago. They’re both back in their teens, shamelessly stealing hearts left and right.

_“Hey, hot stuff Cho!_” Screams the man from the other side of the arrival hall.

He laughs completely ignoring the fact that they’re not really behaving like the almost 40-year-old that they are.

“Hey, hot stuff Han!”

*

The first thing that Seungyoun notices when they get on the car is a shining gold band on Seungwoo’s ring finger and he almost chokes on air.  
The older man snickers as his long-lost friend regains his breathing.

“So, marriage… who’s the lucky Mrs?”  
“Hah, this is old news, Younie. And actually, it’s lucky Mr.”

Seungyoun is at loss for a second and the other Seung just keeps smirking, calmly driving through the busy streets.  
“You never told me.”  
“You never asked.”  
“Yeah, but I was your best friend and you never told me?”  
“To be fair, aren’t you supposed to have a radar or something? Plus it was some sort of late awakening for me. Took me getting wasted at the freshmen welcoming party in University to realise what making out was actually about.”

Seungyoun was still in disbelief staring straight ahead at the road.  
“So are you bi or-“  
“Guys, I’m into guys. Though now I’m mostly into my husband. But yeah, you know?   
You make out with a jerk, a straight-up-fuck-boy and even if he’s the worst kind of guy you realise you never really liked when girls were feeling you up during high school parties. I thought you had gotten the news one way or another, it’s been eighteen years since we got together.” He says wriggling his ring finger proudly.

Seungwoo earns a slap on the thigh only because he unconsciously just made his friend recall their high school reputations.

“Oh my gosh, Han Seungwoo. All those times you were gay and I didn’t know?!   
Do you even understand just how many chances were wasted because of your damn closeting?”

The tone didn’t really bother the Busan resident and he just kept driving happily through the still flowerless trees.

“It’s not that many chances, I shall remind you that no matter our reputations I was far more focused on school and you were more focused on getting a certain younger kid to notice you.”

Seungyoun doesn’t blame his friend for carelessly bringing back all that. After all, he doesn’t know that after leaving for Seoul, the producer never met anyone quite like that younger kid and that sometimes he still wonders what he’s up to and what he’s like now and if his lips still taste the same.

They change the subject quickly and they start talking about something that Seungyoun can keep discussing for hours on end: his son (because apparently, Seungwoo had once read it in a local newspaper about people from their school who had made it big.)

He tells him the complete story and Seungwoo is surprised at his friend’s innate fatherly nature shining through the tenderness in his tone.

The single dad is so taken by his love for his baby that he doesn’t register how Seungwoo seems to know a lot about being a father as well and how he seems to smile in understanding when he starts bragging about all of Dohyon’s achievements.  
When they pull up to a cute suburban house, with a swing and all, Seungyoun stops dead in his tracks suddenly frowning at the handprints in the alleyway.

A road of cute chubby baby hands slowly getting bigger.

He doesn’t need to ask because Seungwoo lets him inside the house while saying:  
“My _boys_ are out with the Taekwondo team and won't be around for the weekend. _Dongpyo_ is not even a member but he’d do anything to get out of the house. A pity, I was hoping you’d get to meet him.”

He’s good enough at connecting the dots to realise that his friend is talking about who he supposes is his son, and only finds further proofs of this as he wanders through the living room.

It’s completely covered in pictures of a small boy that looks far too much like Seungwoo to be adopted.  
He picks one of the pictures and it’s a baby, an infant, but even if he’s incredibly small he still looks so much like his father.

He goes back and forth between looking at his friend and looking at the baby.   
He picks another picture and the boy, _Dongpyo_, must be around ten in this one and it looks exactly as Seungwoo did at his age and again he just stares at it.

“The boy is… he’s like really-“

“Mine, yeah. Technicalities if you ask me. Dongpyo was born through IVF using my sperm, and I’m proud that he looks like me, but it’s not a reason to think he’s exclusively _mine. _Trust me, he’s my child just as much as he is _Yohan’s_.”

He really is choking on air now, having a coughing fit and everything.

Seungwoo only smiles and points to the big silver frame on the accent table next to the couch.  
The picture is so beautiful that it makes Seungyoun regret he never got married.

His friend looks a lot younger in the picture, barely years older than how he looked back when Seungyoun moved to Seoul.   
His spouse is even younger, nineteen at most, but they’re looking at each other with a certainty that the city man has no problem believing in this union.

Seungwoo is saying something about how surprisingly approving his husband’s parents were, regardless of how young their son was and how it took to convince his father to let him do it. And then he’s talking about how he never once thought of not being in love and how in some cases it’s not a gamble at all to marry that young.

But Seungyoun is only half listening because he remembers who this boy was. Who his best friend was.

Taking in a deep breath, his forefinger caresses the outline of both grooms in the picture.  
He’s whispering to himself, but Seungwoo can hear him and beams proudly.

“Kim Yohan, you married _Kim Yohan_.”

He has to fight against the desire to ask Seungwoo if he knows whether or not his husband is in touch with his high school best friend.   
He reckons he probably is because he remembers the Taekwondo prodigy to be very loyal and it was knowledge back when they were in school, that where Kim Yohan was so was _Lee Hangyu_l.

*

Seungyoun is stuck in a sea of people.

The train he was on had a malfunction halfway and made everyone wait for an hour only to then ask them to get down until further notice.   
Everyone is more or less infuriated, trying to give an earful to those poor souls working at the info point that had nothing to do with the technicals problems.

He can barely see where he’s going between all the heads, but he just keeps going forward to reach somewhere where he can ask the fastest way to Seoul.

_“Hey, kiddo. Look remember how I told you I’d be home for dinner? Yeah, I’m sorry.”_

Seungyoun tries to understand where the voice came from. Looking frantically left and right.  
He had a horrible day that's true, but he’s sure that not even the stress of it all can cause him such hallucinations. He’s creative, but not that much.

_“Think you can hop at the Beak’s or the Kim’s for dinner? Yeah I know you can cook, I’m the one who thought you, I just don’t like the idea of you eating alone.”_

Seungyoun is practically breaking his neck to understand where it comes from and he’s pretty sure it’s from somewhere behind him.   
In a rush of panic at the sound of the voice getting further way, he tries to step away from the crowd and run after the man speaking.

_“Okay, kiddo, text me when you get back home. No no, all’s good, but the train is having problems. I’m stuck somewhere in Jeolla.”_

Seungyoun sees a blondish head and a creme coloured sweater that does little to hide the wide set of back muscles and a pair of black slacks that somehow make him look taller than he actually is.

_“Yeah, I already called your godfather, he said he’ll give a heads-up to our supplier to change the meeting from early afternoon to dinner, but I doubt I’ll be back before midnight. What no, that’s stupid Junie, I’m not spending the night there, I’d never make it back in time.”_

The man is getting further away, walking faster and faster, with a slight swagger in his walk and he’s seen that far too many times not to get triggered with memories.

_“Yeah, sure. I haven’t missed one of your shows in 16 years I’m not planning to start now. Of course, who else is gonna tease you endlessly otherwise? Love you too. See you in the morning.”_

He’s gotten closer now and he’s sure. He could recognise the voice everywhere, even after twenty years, that tone, that inflation, that little chuckle after saying ‘_Love you too_’.

Seungyoun has to dodge more than a few people walking countercurrent and risks more than once to bump into a few passersby as he tries to catch up with the man. Now that he has ended his phone call, the man walks more briskly and the producer has to pick up the pace as well.

There’s a new train that just arrived and people start getting off.  
A woman calls for his attention to ask him for help with unloading her baby’s stroller just as Seungyoun is practically at arm's length with the man. He tries to do as fast as he can, still carefully though, making faces at the infant inside it.

_I remember back when Dohyon was this cute…_

The moment he’s done he tries to run in the direction he remembers the man going.  
But it’s no use and no matter how much he crane’s his neck he can’t find that man or hear that voice.

He hasn’t thought of him in so long, he sighs sitting on one of the benches of the station.   
Yet he seems to be the only name he can think of since he found out about Seungwoo’s marriage.   
He avoided talking much about Yohan, knowing that he wouldn’t be able to hold down his curiosity, but he thought of him nonstop for the past two days.

And now he’s sure he heard him.   
The voice was just a shade deeper than it used to be, but it was still his voice, he is certain of it.  
He talked the way he used to. Chuckled the way he used to. Stressed certain vowels the way he used to.  
But mostly it made shivers run down Seungyoun’s spine the way he used to.

He shakes his head trying to get it out of his mind, walking up to an info point to ask when’s the next train to Seoul.   
It doesn’t matter to him how much it takes to get there, just as long as he doesn’t have to spend much time waiting in this overcrowded place.

There’s one leaving in ten minutes he finds out.  
Right on the other side of the station.  
He blesses his past as a soccer player, making him quick on his feet and relatively fatigue resistant.

He gets in the train with heavy breathing and a light layer of sweat practically collapsing on his seat in the full wagon.

Seungyoun takes out his phone ready to text Dohyon to know if he plans to sleep at his mother’s or if he should make a reservation at the ramen house his been obsessed with lately.

That’s when he hears the voice again and all the rest of the world goes still.   
He doesn’t notice the train starting to move.   
He can only see this one man in front of him.

His hair lighter than it used to be, he's not wearing his glasses and he looks older now.

_Still as handsome, though._

“No way!” His smile is the same, too. “Seungyoun hyung?!”

His heart skips a beat and he’s once again a starry-eyed 17 years old wannabe musician trying to get the laid back, friendly freshman to see him _that way._

“_Hangyul.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heyyyy!  
I hope you guys like it!  
Anyways this story will include a lot of different point of views but counting it all begins with seungyul meeting again it made sense to start like this.  
I'm starting to really like seunghan (which i never would have imagined back in the pdx101 days).  
Also as you may have noticed i haven't included Eunsang and Junho yet cause i couldnt come up with characters yet.. Eunsang is fine now, but i still need to find something for Junho.  
Comment and Kudos are always welcome hehe <3<3  
have a nice weekend!


	3. DOHYON I

_"Another thing I could have noticed in the following days was that dad was really strange. Sometimes he would disappear for hours on end and no one knew where he went. He seemed always cheerful, too cheerful, but most of all his eyes shined like someone who had drunk too much, yet his breath always smelled as fresh as mint." - Domenico 'Mimmo' Cesaroni (1x01)_

* * *

_‘I’ll come to pick you up at seven. We’re having a family dinner at Kauri <3”_

That was what the note on his bedroom door said. And seeing the semi-formal attire laid by his father on his bed he knew that it was going to be an important evening.

Dohyon wasn’t worried nor surprised in the slightest, to be honest.   
He had been expecting this kind of thing and he was pretty sure he already knew what all of this was about.  
He even had an ongoing mock bet with Beomseok (his mother’s opulent and only apparently serious manager in his mid-thirties) on when exactly his father was going to find the guts to actually bring it up.

It didn’t take a genius to notice how his father had changed over the past few months not to mention his recurring trips to the south and the way he’d always come back with the greatest smile he had ever seen on his lips.

Add to that the time the fourteen years old was kind of eavesdropping on a conversation that was mostly made of giggles and hushed flirting (that almost made him puke) and it was easy to put two and two together.   
But dad was definitely happier than he had ever seen him so he was cool with it, he thought walking down the stairs again and into the kitchen looking for snacks or something.

There was a cake, in the middle of the kitchen counter.   
The box was sealed so he couldn’t see exactly what was inside, but he could recognize the round, fancy, purple box with little light blue bows everywhere.   
The Cho-Park family was practically a regular client there seeing how it was his mom’s favorite bakery (and for extension his too).

He smiled.   
If he had shown any sign of knowledge about his father’s affair he doubted the man would have bothered so much about this.   
So now he was practically going to have the best dinner of the year only to be told a piece of not so shocking news that he had known for pretty much two months now.

Honestly, when he had mentioned the possibility that the man had an affair to his history tutor (Eunsang was beginning to feel like an older brother rather than a tutor anyway) the 16 years old looked slightly baffled at the nonchalance that the tall genius had while speculating on his own father’s love life.

And Dohyon could see where his hyung came from.  
It wasn’t usual in Korea to be raised by single dads. Single moms yes, divorcees also a big yes, widowed weren’t so strange either.   
But people seemed to deem Dohyon’s family dynamics as quite bizarre.

Because his parents were both alive, both loving, and also seemed to love each other very much.   
Then again most of them didn’t know the producer was homosexual and the love his mom and dad felt for each other wasn’t of the same nature married couples usually had.   
So it made sense that netizens had always wondered why, no matter the obvious affection between Cho Seungyoun and Park Jimin, the two never married even after having a child together.

But maybe that wasn’t exactly where Eunsang was coming from, cause even after Dohyon told him, he seemed pretty baffled by the way the younger seemed not to care much as long as his father was happy.

_[ ‘That’s your dad. And it’s the first time he seems to come close to loving someone outside the family, doesn’t it worry you? What if you don’t like him?’_

_‘He’s always in a good mood so why worry? Plus my dad wouldn’t date someone that I wouldn’t get along with.’]_

*

Dohyon spent the rest of the day writing music and eating chocolate chip cookies until his mother came along.

He never really understood why his mom even bothered having her own apartment when she spent so much time with them and lived literally across the street and his dad just laughed it off telling him it would ruin her chances to find a decent man.   
(Though his wonderfully independent momma smacked him in the head and told him she didn’t need a man as long as she always had Dohyon.)

The infamous Park Jimin was already dressed and ready to go, bright red hair and blue suit, beaming in excitement.   
As he dressed he let his mother check his work and projects and as always he was face to face with artist Jimin instead of his regular mom Jaime.

When he got back from the bathroom, she was humming quietly writing down some stuff on his notebook with her immaculate, pretty penmanship.

“I wrote some lyrics that could go well with your new song, it’s about first love, but it’s not much. I think it fits really well, you should give it a listen tomorrow. Maybe you can come up with the rest of the lines.”

Before he could say anything the intercom rang from the floor below and his mother swiftly took his hand and lead him out the flat.

While they made their way out he noticed she had the most teasing smile, something that was actually recurrent whenever she felt like teasing her best friend.  
On the elevator ride, Jimin slowly passed a hand through her son’s hair, ruffling it a little bit and then adjusting his collar.

“Gotta look nice, with all the effort your father is making today.” She said snorting and winking at him.  
“You know too, right mom?” He replied with the same amused tone.

“Of course I know. I’m his best friend. Plus where do you think you got your wits from.” She said scoffing.   
“Your dad might be very smart but he trusts his own skills a little too much at times, he’s been so completely obvious about this whole matter. I’m surprised he managed to keep it to himself at all, I would have imagined for him to just introduce the guy to us a lot earlier.”

“Do you know who he’s seeing?” He asked, only now wondering if he was ever gonna truly meet the guy or if he was just a seasonal fling (except that dad didn’t really do seasonal flings, his boyfriends only ever lasted a few weeks, far apart from each other and never sounded important enough to need a dinner to be officialized.)

“Unfortunately not, my love. But I’m sure we’ll find out soon enough.” She answered before waving at the black Mercedes driving towards them.

*

Only later on, Dohyon realized he had forgotten about the cake in the kitchen but apparently his father hadn’t and alongside it, there was now another box.   
His dad placed the cake in front of the female soloist and the other gift in front of his son, gesturing for the two to open them.

The whole dinner over the curse of the night had become ominous in the boy’s opinion, especially seeing how the producer’s eyes were glistening in the chandelier light and his smile seemed strained.

The foreboding feeling started as soon as he saw his father.  
He was shaking in excitement but his eyes were moving around nervously and his face was switching from a smile to a tight-lipped frown.

His dad had reserved the same place they always booked for special events, a small booth in the far back, away from paparazzi’s prying eyes.   
The Kauri was a Japanese restaurant Dohyon had found online while working on a school project back when he barely even knew how to actually use his father’s laptop years ago and his father had ended getting a text message to confirm a reservation for the night after.

Dohyon had expected to get scolded for booking a table in such an expensive place, but Seungyoun only laughed it off saying he always knew his son had a great taste for food and from then on they had dinner there at least three times a year (their birthdays and the anniversary of that little funny event, ashis father called it.)

For the majority of the night, his father didn’t mention anything about _that _or a possible _him_, choosing to tell Jimin about what she had missed while she was working in America.

Dohyon zoned out and nodded happily as Seungyoun bragged about how the boy was getting better and better grades in history.   
How he was bound to become the top of the class seeing it was the only subject he ever had problems with.   
His dad wasn’t only partly exaggerating and to be fair Dohyon had stopped needing an actual tutor a long time ago, but he had grown attached to Eunsang and was in no way willing to let their session end even if they rarely ever studied.

Jimin was kind enough to let her best friend finish his brief monologue about the greatness of their son, grinning in satisfaction herself regardless of already being aware of all of it.

Dohyon wondered for a moment if his dad truly thought he hadn’t already told his mom when she got back or if he was just trying to find an excuse to boast, but either way, he didn’t mind being on the receiving end of their love, although it did make him blush faintly.

When he realized his father was seemingly not going to say a word about whoever it was that made him flush over the phone, for a moment he thought it really was a matter of random excitement and spontaneous need to go out celebrate.

_Had his father written a new song he didn’t know about?   
Was Dohyon forgetting an important date?_   
_Maybe his father only wanted to celebrate the arrival of summer soon and couldn’t wait because Jimin was leaving for Thailand?_

But he was guessing blindly before he even had any kind of actual hint. And, indeed, when Dohyon saw that purple cake box with another light blue long box appearing in the waiters’ hands from behind his dad, he knew he was right about an impending confession.

The confident and cocky producer WOODZ made space for a slightly anxious Seungyoun who started to rub his hands together and bounce his leg under the table.

“I wanted to tell you a thing or two and I didn’t know how to. A song seemed a little too cheesy and strange, so here.” He said in a rushed exhale gesturing to the two packages that now replaced their plates.

Dohyon opened his gift first, temporarily forgetting about the uneasiness he felt a moment before at how significantly his dad was treating the night and overwhelmed with euphoria as he saw the brand new synthesizer, with a personalized silver tag that said 이상한 아이 (_weird kid_).  
He started grazing softly the keyboard.

“Dad, I- Thank you…”

His delighted thanks died out softly while focusing on a little, small rectangle resting next to the tag.  
There was a small patinated card with words in his dad’s writing saying:

_You will always be my beloved weird kid._

He turned the card around to find another sentence: _But I’ve been thinking about-_

The note only said that leaving the phrase hanging and he looked to his father who was gesturing for Jimin to open the other package.

His mother needn’t be told twice and opened the box to find an elaborately decorated Sacher: chocolate toppings, lemon zest, berries and all. It was his mom’s favorite and it showed in the way she clapped excitedly, a motion he always knew he himself had taken from her.  
There was a second note, just like the one he had found in his gift:

_You will always be part of my life and family._

Without meaning to, he quickly took the card from his mom’s perfectly manicured metallic blue fingers and flipped it over placing it next to his.

He took in the words written before him and his face morphed in one of complete shock, no joy or anger or anything particular, just pure stupefaction.

He had expected for his father to admit to seeing someone, maybe even being in love, but this… he hadn’t seen this coming.  
His mom next to him smiled widely and confusedly at the same time.

“What the heck does it mean, Cho Seungyoun? What do you mean by ‘grow’?” She exclaimed apparently not caring about the fact that she was practically screaming in her son’s ear.

“Certainly you can’t mean what I think you mean. We don’t even know who this guy is! He could be only after your money, he and Dohyon could not get along or worse, what if I don’t like him. You’re not allowed to do anything until I approve of him.”

Dohyon flipped the cards a few times to reread the now complete message formed by the two cards.

_You will always be my beloved weird kid. You will always be part of my life and family.  
But I’ve been thinking about making our family grow just a tiny bit._

He schooled his features in a slightly bemused stupor instead of the utter disbelief and panic as he raised his head to face his father.   
The man was smiling widely, looking at him expectantly as to get a reaction. _How the hell was he supposed to react?!_

His father never even said he had been seeing someone explicitly and now he was hinting at… at a… at them getting...

Dohyon looked to his right, to study how his mother was taking it, afraid to look at his father too long and betray the fact that he felt completely lost.

The cool and fun Park Jimin, as expected, reacted quite freely. She paused her rant about not approving until she met him to share a look with her long-time friend and her face transformed in a serious and a little concerned frown, but it only lasted a second.

“Well… I must admit it feels weird and I’m not exactly sure what to feel about this.” She said waving her hand over the two cards.  
“But if I get to meet him and he seems good for you. _Both_ of you. I don’t see why not. God knows how many times I prayed you wouldn’t be forever alone Seungyoun, we all know you were never the kind.” She sighed with a small smile, she took a berry from the cake and brought it to her lips never once losing eye contact with Dohyon’s father.

“But I’m not letting you have full say on my son’s step-parent, understood. I get a say just as much as Dohyon. That’s final.”

The boy slowly turned to the man as he did the same, looking at him with a nervous smile.

“What do you say, love?” His dad’s eyes were happy, but he could easily see the hint of moisture in them, the emotion in them crystal and almost palpable.   
Dohyon found himself smiling and nodding even if he wasn’t sure about what he meant by doing so.

His father exhaled in relief and started slowly glancing between the two of them. Dohyon was afraid for a second that he would be asked to say something and his mind was just too overwhelmed right now to comprehend anything, but his mother had him covered and reached for his hand under the table, squeezing slightly.

“Well when will it happen, then?”

“Oh I don’t know, I haven’t really planned it out yet. I’d like for the two of you to meet him first. But if you both like him and all goes well… yeah, I think I might just ask him, you know? I can’t get any younger and I’ve always waited for the right person to come and-“

“But are you sure he’s the right one? Isn’t three months too little for that?”

“Yeah, except it hasn’t been three months. It’s been_ 21 years_.” He said with a fond smile, the tears in his eyes shining even brighter.

Dohyon couldn’t believe what he just heard. 21 years meant for far longer than his own life, longer than his parents had known each other, longer than his father’s life in Seoul. It didn’t make sense for a moment in his head, but the sincerity and tenderness in his dad’s voice were real.

“I guess I wasn’t waiting for love to arrive, just to _come back_.”

Dohyon listened as his father talked about how he had first met this man.   
How he used to spend his high school days only ever trying to get his attention and how they finally got together over the summer before his senior year and how they were an obnoxious couple until Seungyoun decided to move away.

The 14-year-old could hear the affection stand out from his animated tone and unconsciously started smiling and tearing up as his dad talked about how he never loved anyone in a romantic way.   
The man told them how, when they met again on a train to Seoul, he understood why people said that one can’t ever forget the first love.

Dohyon quietly nodded along in understanding, his eyes shining in joy as his father seemed as excited and in love as ever telling them about how the exchanged numbers and started talking again. How Seungyoun tried not to be so eager about visiting him and how _Hangyul_, that was the man’s name, always found the strangest reasons to drive up to the capital.

Somehow he ended up reaching out with his left hand across the table to hold his father's hand, his right still unclosed in his mothers.

He tried to picture this mysterious man, sitting next to his dad, smiling with what the 39-year-old man insisted was the most charming grin in South Korea and smiled to himself.

Dohyon’s hands were busy holding the two people he cared the most, his father seemed convinced that this man would totally come to love him just as much and even if he hadn’t met Hangyul yet and his dad was only contemplating popping the question he was actually looking forward to it a little bit.   
To have someone else in their small family, someone to love and love him and most importantly keep that genuine, blissful expression on his dad’s face.

He kind of couldn’t wait to meet this man.   
Couldn’t wait for his dad to get married and their little family to become a little less little.

*

Dohyon frowned as he swirled the invitation in his slender fingers, pausing to study the golden cursive on the front.

His father’s name was written after Hangyul’s, even though his dad was three years older than the other man. Not that it mattered because they were going to keep their last name anyways.

He watched as his dad talked excitedly over the phone, his hands still playing with the wedding invitation.   
It was only a mock card, and there were at least another twenty or so scattered around their living room in different fonts and colors.   
But they all made Dohyon really uncomfortable.

Not for the wedding itself. But for two particular reasons.

Number one, the address his father put in the invitation and what he already knew it implied.

His father had asked him what he thought about moving even before asking Hangyul to marry him, saying that if the younger man agreed he was hoping to go live in the south, missing the maritime city and hoping to give his son a taste of a more carefree teenage life away from the chaotic and capitalistic metropolis.

Dohyon answered truthfully, asking why couldn’t the other two move to Seoul, why did he have to be the one to leave it all behind.

His father was left speechless at that and gaped at him for a whole minute before excusing himself.   
He never saw his father quite as down as that day and that night he made some researches online.

He approached his dad after three days, with the calculations for a season ticket subscription for the KTX, a written contract that said he could go back to Seoul on the first weekend of every month (if his mother’s schedule allowed it) and that Eunsang could always come to visit and stay over without previous notice.

And a new keyboard because he never had the guts to tell his dad he accidentally broke the old one.

His father covered him in kisses and his mom patted him on the back saying how she was proud of him for choosing to make his dad happy.   
But when Seungyoun left to call Hangyul and tell him the great news he noticed his mother’s face fall a little as she hugged him fiercely.

That night he slept at his mom’s place and complained about the idea of moving away.   
Away from school and piano lessons and guitar and flute and how he was actually looking forward to freshmen year because Eunsang had promised to look after him.

And his mom let him get it all out happily until he said he didn’t like the idea of living so far away from her.   
That’s when she told him to never complain in front of his father, because that would have hurt him and to try and only see the best part about starting a new life and that she was always traveling anyways.

She hugged him tightly once more, but Dohyon saw the sadness in her eyes.

After that, he still complained about the prospect of living in Busan, but he avoided talking about how much he would have missed his mom’s smile and hugs and passion for singing and how she would always help him write lyrics.

Dohyon bat his eyes quickly, trying to stop his eyes from water at the idea of leaving his mom behind. He stared at the names in the invitation intently.

The second thing that bothered him was right there, written in fancy calligraphy next to his own name, under the title ‘_best man’._

He heard his father softly whisper _‘I love you’from the other room_.

He had met Lee Hangyul five times over the past three months and though it seemed early for a union, he had to admit the man was cool enough and seemed to love the producer genuinely, yet there was something fishy about him.

From the way he seemed quite uncomfortable to the idea of them visiting Busan, even if they were going to literally live there in less then six months, to the infinite excuses he seemed to find for always coming to the capital all alone and the fact that for someone who enjoyed talking about his son so much he didn’t seem very eager to introduce him to his soon to be new family members.

Frowning Dohyon traced the golden letters one by one.

_ When will I get to meet my dearest future older brother, _Lee Hyeongjun_?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hola!!  
i've been wanting to continue this for so long and it feels great to actually do it now.  
I'm sorry for the wait, it's been so long...  
Anyways, as always i hope you enjoyed reading it, we actually get to see a little more family dynamics in here and i gotta say i loved writing dohyon so i hope to do it again soon (the POVs will change)  
I know some of you were expecting the meeting but it'll probably be a flashback or something like that, same goes with the proposal... im gonna jump a little bit from here and there according to the perspectives so it wont be as linear, but ill try to make sure it's understandable or leave side notes if it becomes messy  
once again i hope you liked it and if you have any critique or comment fire away, its always nice to hear your feedback!  
Thanks for reading and you can @ me on twitter @rant_stan_jdn <3  
love you
> 
> Ps in case I haven't said it before, let's all pretend being gay is fully accepted in Korea as well as gay marriages and adoptions...


	4. HANGYUL I

_I saw you last night and got that old feeling_   
_When you came in sight I got that old feeling_   
_The moment that you danced by I felt a thrill_   
_And when you caught my eye my heart stood still_   
_Once again I seemed to feel that old yearning_   
_And I knew the spark of love was still burning_   
_There'll be no new romance for me, it's foolish to start_   
_For that old feeling, is still in my heart_   
_There'll be no new romance for me, it's foolish to start_   
_For that old feeling, is still in my heart_

* * *

Hangyul was about to have a mental break down.   
Or a nervous one, he never really understood the difference between the two but still, he wasn’t feeling quite calm about all this.

If someone told him six months ago that he would end up feeling like a shy little fifteen-year-old on his way to go on a date he would have scoffed, said that he wasn’t interested in that kind of thing and that he was running late for Taekwondo 6-7-year-old class. 

But today he asked for Somi to teach in his stead and the girl agreed in exchange for a Saturday off her usual practice. 

The warm sun of early June felt like a relaxing caress and it was making the small band on his finger shine brightly, reflecting the light over the train’s seats.  
He bit his lip in thought, slowly turning the ring on his fingers and replaying Jiwon’s excited voice over the phone:  
_“Well, Hangyul. Let me just say: it’s about time!"_ She had exclaimed.   
_ "We’ve all been waiting for this news. Hyeoungjun is growing older each day and you can cling to him only for so long. I’m happy for you.” _

Hangyul didn’t recall ever hearing Jiwon-nuna anything but supportive and cheery and he still thought of her as one of the main reasons he had the guts to follow his heart this very moment. 

_“I’m sure she is happy for you too, wherever she is. I always thought my sister would have hated the idea of you growing old alone.”_

He stared at the wedding band for a moment.   
He only ever took it off once since the day she put it on him.  
It was before Hyeongjun was even born because his fingers were swelling due to the hot weather. 

To ease the uncomfortable feeling he slipped it off before cleaning the kitchen after breakfast.   
He panicked when he couldn’t find it anymore and when she got home after her yoga class in the afternoon she sat on the floor next to him, held a flashlight as he unscrewed the sink pipes and laughed maniacally at his despair.   
By sundown, she had tears of amusement in her eyes and he had tears of frustration starting to gather up.

_[ “Close your eyes, dummy.” _   
_Her soft chuckle is clear in his memories._   
_ “I found it this morning on the kitchen floor before leaving. I was a little disappointed, you know? Not even a year and I thought maybe you were already having second thoughts about marrying me. I’m sorry I let you panic all day, but you looked so cute I couldn’t resist.”_   
_He never took it off since.]_

It felt like a betrayal, but if he wanted this to work he had to put in some effort.   
And he truly did want this to work, so with a little force, he tugged on the band and put it in his wallet, feeling naked and defenseless.   
The lightness on his ring finger felt heavy on his heart.

Hangyul looked out the train window the whole time, too tense to fall asleep.  
After an hour or so, his finger had stopped tingling leaving the man free to focus on the way his heart seemed to try and match its beating to the pace of the vehicle.

It was the first time Hangyul came to visit Seungyoun and not the other way around. But relationships are built on feelings and words and actions from both sides so he thought it was about time to see how his boyfriend lived in the big city. 

Hangyul laughed at himself.  
_ Relationship. Boyfriend. _  
There was something so cheesy in all of it.  
Something that was straight out of a movie. And it was such an overused trope too: _high school sweethearts meeting again as adults. _

He always thought it was so exaggerated, the whole concept of never really getting over your first love and wishing to go back in time to ‘fix’ things. 

Even if in all honesty, he did think about his hyung a lot over the years (to the point he could say he was still not truly over him), he never thought he’d ever see him again, let alone realise he still loved him.

Yet it took so little to have him feeling all those things he used to feel back then.

*

The day they met again, in February on that train to Seoul, Hangyul felt starstruck. 

The very moment he saw him again he felt new life breathed into his lungs and when he heard the older man say his name, it was like he never even stopped loving this person sitting next to him in the wagon.

They talked for the rest of the journey, jumping from one topic to the other without ever feeling awkward.   
It was like they had never parted ways.   
Or at least that was how Hangyul felt, seeing how his heartbeat was speeding up and skipping beats at every amused laugh his hyung let out. 

They were being loud, as they got off the train, far louder than two respectable men in their thirties were supposed to be in the middle of the day.   
But Hangyul couldn’t care less because it was almost expected. They were always loud when they were together.

The Soulite talked him into having a coffee with him and he agreed embarrassingly fast, knowing he had until 7 pm before having to head to his appointment.

They spent the time catching up about the smallest things and somewhere between the station to the small retro cafè the producer took him to, he realised that he had never mentioned Hyeongjun. 

The same way his hyung hadn't mentioned his own kid.

So Hangyul tries to be casual about it as if it’s something he already told him about.   
He didn’t understand why bringing up his son was such a task for his brain, but then again he wasn’t sure that saying something like _‘Hey I think I still have feelings for you, also I can’t stay in Seoul for too long cause my 15-year-old son is home alone right now’_ was considered a smooth way of flirting.

Hangyul liked to think he was laid back in his acting as if he hadn’t purposely angled his phone to let the producer see the picture of a croissant and americano he was sending with a row of yellow and orange hearts.

“Sending updates to your better half?” 

Hangyul almost smirked at the piqued interest shining through the fox-like eyes.   
_Would he be disappointed if I said yes?_ He thought to himself.   
The older man used to be quite jealous back in the days and Hangyul was slightly yearning to be the subject of his endearing inquisition once again.

“Yeah… Well, not exactly.” He saw his hyung’s face change in a series of quick various expression until Hangyul specified: "My son is definitely my better half.”

The other’s face lit up, more than he imagined, and started asking questions, but not before proudly announcing that he had a son as well.  
It happened quite naturally actually and from the moment they started talking about their kids they never swayed from that subject.

Every once in awhile the name _Park Jimin_ was casually dropped and, after reinforcing the concept that she was the kid’s mother but for no reason the father’s partner, he started to wonder if the producer was expecting him to talk about Hyeongjun’s mom too. 

But the question was never explicitly asked and Hangyul was more than happy to play dumb on the matter.

They talked more and more and, looking back at it, he couldn’t remember half of the things that were said, only that he hadn't felt such happiness from the bottom of his heart in a long, long time. 

Seungyoun insisted to wait for him after his appointment, saying that he had no problem chilling around for an hour or so around the block of the building.   
He wanted to see him off at the station, he said, to make sure he was safe and sound.

The meeting was short and simple, only having to finalise some details that were decided over the phone and resigning the contract that declared for the new equipment to be sent to the gym every six months for the next three years.

The ride to the station was mellow and intimate, as they stood closer than regular friends would, their fingers brushing every few steps.   
The underground was as noisy and packed even more than he imagined, reminding him why he liked living away from all that chaos.   
Having Seungyoun next to him somehow made him feel at home though.

When they reached the station he tried to find as many topics he could, to stall their imminent parting of ways.   
But the train was about to get in.   
They had fifteen minutes before Hangyul left once again and Seungyoun went back to being a producer he once upon a time loved, living his dream far away.

Hangyul didn’t know what had gotten into him until after it happened; he was standing there with his ears red and hot and his lips trembling. 

He took a step back and saw the other man softly touching his cheek on the spot Hangyul's lips came in contact with his soft skin.   
Before he could go on and walk away, the Seoulite tugged on his arm until their noses were brushing against each other. 

“I’ve wanted to do this since I saw you on the train." He whispered against his lips.  
"I know we haven’t seen each other in decades. I know I shouldn’t do this because you have this on your finger, but I have so many regrets when it comes to you. I can’t let you go like this. I get if you don’t want this, so please stop me if I misread the situation…” 

Hangyul stood there, barely breathing, his heartbeat loud in his head.

The taller man took half a step forward to close the gap between them, slowly taking in the softness of lips on lips for the first time in years. 

It was a slow, tender kiss; the heat coming from his hyung's body made the February evening air feel colder on his blushing face.   
They parted ways reluctantly, holding hands for as long as they could.

Seungyoun looked at him with a strange spark in his eyes, caressing Hangyul’s warm hand. Even though he was a few inches shorter his hand had always been far bigger than his hyung’s. 

He let out a breathy small laugh looking at their joint hands and his eyes lingered on his ring finger.   
Seungyoun seemed to catch what had made him freeze and frowned, retracting his hand from Hangyul’s in light-speed. 

“I-I’m sorry. I- I shouldn’t have kissed you." He stuttered.  
"I’ve seen it from the moment we met on the train and I told myself I wasn’t going to do anything, but you… god, Hangyul, you haven’t changed one bit.” His hyung’s voice was barely above a whisper and even though they weren’t holding hands anymore neither of them had taken a step back, which meant their faces were still less than 30 centimeters apart. 

Hangyul could feel the warmth of Seungyoun's small panicked breathes on his cheeks and without thinking he closed the gap between them once more.

Seungyoun kissed him back, but only briefly before pushing away.

“We can’t Hangyul, I shouldn’t have started this. I’m sorry, I just… Thinking that this,” he said gesturing between the two of them  
“isn’t going anywhere, it can’t get anywhere kills me. One afternoon with you and it’s like I never left like I’m still 18 and you’re still that junior who played basketball and Taekwondo and danced at competitions and I can’t control myself." He said closing his eyes tightly.

"But we both know we can’t go beyond this. Just these kisses are already too much. I don’t want to be that for you and I know you enough to know that if you’re married with a kid, you don’t really want this either. You’re not a cheater. And if you were I don’t think I could… like you after all this time.”

Hangyul looked at him confused, before remembering that those who didn’t know him couldn’t know.  
That unless you were a part of his life or from the neighborhood, you wouldn’t know about her. 

You would still think of Hangyul as a married man, seeing the shining golden band on his finger.  
It was the reason he kept on wearing it. 

Seungyoun was staring at him with hurt in his eyes, taking deep breaths as to calm himself while Hangyul turned his wedding band on his finger, pained at the reminder but willing to let it go. 

Seungyoun always had this power on him, one look at the older guy and he knew he couldn’t let it be an obstacle, not after the way he made him feel all day.

The Busan man took a stride forward, closing his tanned hand over the older’s pale wrist, not letting him move further away.   
He kissed him again, less tenderly this time, more passionate and desperate, channelling the intensity of what being back with his first love felt like.

Seungyoun relaxed in the kiss, his hand coming up to Hangyul’s nape, gripping tightly as the younger naturally brought his arm around his waist.   
Twenty years and it still felt so natural.

When they parted, his hands came up to cup the older man’s face, making him lean slightly so their foreheads rested against each other.

“I’m not married” he whispered softly, barely audible over Seungyoun’s heavy breathing. “Not- Not anymore.”  
  
They stayed there for lord knows ho long, just staring in each other’s eyes.  
  
“You’re not married?” 

Seungyoun's voice was unsure and shy as if he expected it to be a lie, but his eyes shone in relief as Hangyul shook his head. 

“You’re not married.” He repeated laughing a little and leaning down to kiss him once again.

Before either of them knew it, the train he was supposed to take arrived and he had to run across the station to get it, but not before taking out in a hurry a business card with his (and Yohan’s) number on it and stealing one last kiss.

When he got on the train, out of breath and starting to break a sweat he could only smile, happiness coming from deep in his heart. 

On his way back, somewhere between Seoul and Busan, his phone buzzed and he let out a contempt sigh reading the unknown number.

_\- Have a safe trip back, Hangyul. And Goodnight. <3_

_\- Goodnight, Seungyoun hyung._

*

Hangyul was brought back to the present, hearing the train controller announcing they were in Seoul.

The travel bag he had with him felt burdensome in his hand and he took a deep breathe stepping out slowly.   
He closed an eye uncomfortably, partly blinded by the sun.  
It was almost lunchtime by now, the warmth of mid Spring making his skin prickle already getting tanned.

Hangyul had booked a room in a hotel just a few meters from the station and quickly went to unpack.  
Maybe change even, try something a little less sporty than his travel clothes.  
His hands started sweating profusely wondering what kind of dress code one was supposed to keep when first meeting his boyfriend's son. 

He heard his phone buzz once, then twice with a familiar tone that only meant one thing.  
His heart sunk, guilt eating up his heart. _How was he supposed to tell Seungyoun?_

He glanced at his phone and quickly replied, his forehead twisted in a frown. 

_\- I just got in Daegu, kid. I'll tell your aunt you said hi._

Needless to say, he wasn't in Daegu and he wasn't supposed to see any of Hyeongjun's aunts.   
He sighed and dismissed the thought, grabbing his things and leaving the hotel.

It wasn't his fault, he repeated in his head.  
Or, rather, it was his fault but he couldn't think of a better solution.

Hangyul just wasn't ready to tell him. To tell Hyeongjun about Seungyoun. Not yet.

_I'll just tell Seungyoun Hyeongjun had a sudden fever and couldn't come._  
  
Hangyul pushed the door open and looked around, craning his neck.

A boy, no older than his own, locked eyes with him the very moment the bell of the diner signaled his entrance.  
He was cute and chubby and his eyes were glossy and innocent, reminding Hangyul of an overgrown Hamster.

He found himself smiling at the boy and only a second later he wondered if maybe it was a little creepy for a 36 years old man to smile at a kid.  
Fortunately, the man next to the pre-teen stood up promptly noticing the exchanging gazes and drawing Hangyul's attention. 

Hangyul's face naturally broke into a grin, recognizing his boyfriend. 


	5. HYEONGJUN I

_Oh, why you look so sad?_   
_Tears are in your eyes_   
_Come on and come to me now_   
_Don't be ashamed to cry_   
_Let me see you through_   
_'Cause I've seen the dark side too_   
_When the night falls on you_   
_You don't know what to do_   
_Nothin' you confess could make me love you less_

_I'll stand by you,_

* * *

His right arm was numb, a heavyweight was pressing him down, his left cheek was heating uncomfortably under the August morning sun and something prickly was on his face and neck making him stir in his drowsiness. 

Still, Hyeongjun woke up with a soft, contempt smile on his lips.

His eyes opened only to realise that there was no way he could look at anything besides the white ceiling and the peach coloured hanging pendant. 

Hyeongjun stared ahead for a few seconds, trying not to breathe too loud and taking in the relaxing sound of the birds chirping. 

_Fuck, I could get used to this._

The sun coming from the window wasn’t that strong which meant he could take his time before sneaking out, he figured, starting to wriggle the fingers of his right hand to wake his paralysed limb. 

Slowly Hyeongjun started to shift his position, leaning to a side to slip his arm away from the waist that was trapping it. 

_Well, this is useless,_ he thought as the body tangled with his whined softly and pressed a sleepy hand on his torso to keep him in his place.

He chuckled silently, feeling the still dormant head cutely scooting closer to rest on the crook of his neck and smoothing on his skin the strange simultaneity of soft, strawberry-smelling hair and the prickly ends of it. 

He stilled, trying to understand if she was asleep or not and when no movement happened and no noise was heard he smiled trying to look down.

_Still bossy, even when she’s asleep. _

Hyungjun let his left arm come up to hold her closer by the waist, taking a deep breath to let his whole body relax as it assimilated the scent that he now linked to affection and comfort and something in his heart he wasn’t sure he was ready to acknowledge yet.

She stirred, turning away in a huff and pointedly flipped her hair all over Hyeongjun’s face.  
He remained silent, waiting for her to fully wake up and gingerly stroked her hair away from his cheeks and back in its' place. 

He didn’t know how much they stayed like there, maybe mere seconds, maybe whole minutes.  
Honestly, he was a little too lost in the way her silver waves were shining against her dark blue sheets to notice.

“Huh, okay!” she exclaimed hopping up to sit on the bed energetically after a few minutes.

Hyeongjun yelped in surprise and glared at her for scaring the living daylights out of him.   
He was never gonna get used to the fact that she woke up bright and lively from the get-go.  
He thought, propping himself up to rest his back against the headboard.

She laughed at his annoyed face and it was enough to blow him away. Hyeongjun felt his own gaze soften at the way she fixed her barely-there bangs and looked at him straight in the eyes.

“Good morning.” She whispered quietly slowly inching down to rest her hands and chin on his chest. 

Hyeongjun laughed wholeheartedly, a little amazed by the fact that he had the honour of waking up next to this beautiful person.

_Damn, what did I do to deserve someone like you, Baek Ji Heon? _

He brought his hands up to caress her locks only to pinch her cheeks tightly until she started throwing daggers at him.  
He smirked at her indignant face.

“Good morning to you too.”

She poked his side, making him jerk as a reaction and making the grin on his face grow wider.

He loved how comfortable they were with each other.

“I was trying to be sweet and you had to ruin it” she huffed pretending to be offended and turning the other way.

“Awww, no don’t get mad baby,” Hyeongjun reached out to tickle her and trapped her in a hug.  
“I’ll make it up to you, I’ll be as sweet as diabetes.” He said trying to cover her face in little pecks.

Jiheon laughed trying to get away, avoiding his lips. 

“Ew, _disgusting, disgusting, disgusting._” She squealed happily. “I’m not kissing you with morning breath.” 

After a few seconds of tickling and giggling, as if reading each other’s minds, they suddenly stopped and looked at each other intensely.

There was something so truly breathtaking in the way she looked: her breathing worked up from laughing too much, her eyes shining on him and the visible softness of her cheeks. 

Especially up so close.

Hyeongjun smiled a little dumbly at her, muttering a little ‘_Hey_’ before leaning in.

The moment he closed his eyes to kiss her he came in contact with her palm and reopened his eyes to find her smirking teasingly at him.

“No kissing with morning breath” she singsonged patting him on the cheek. 

Hyeongjun raised an eyebrow challengingly and swiftly took advantage of the way Jiheon was leaning on her hands to readjust her seating. Before she could register it, he pecked her on the lips and laughed at her reaction.

Her eyes sparkled cutely, but she still whined loudly pouting and slapping him on the leg. Hyeongjun laughed enthusiastically and less than three seconds later his girlfriend looked at his happy face and joined him.

The moment their laughter created a sweet, youthful harmony they froze in place, heads snapping to look at each other in a panic remembering something.

“How long do I have before your father comes upstairs to check on us?” Asked Hyeongjun.

“Thirty seconds at best?” She replied uncertainly, raising her shoulders.

Hyeongjun dashed out of the bed. 

He quickly straightened his t-shirt and shorts before stopping to wink at Jiheon.

She smiled lovingly before shooing him away.

“If he finds you here, he won’t ever let you stay the night anymore.”

“Well, you’re the one who laughs too hard, so it’s not my fault.” He rushed, blowing raspberries at her before running out the door and towards the guestroom opposite to his girlfriend’s.

He closed the door just in time to hear a series of soft thuds coming up the stairs. 

He wasn’t sure why they were pretending like that. 

He was pretty positive both Mr. and Mrs. Beak knew he didn’t spend the night in the room they had prepared for him and they also knew nothing really happened even if they did sleep in the same bed. So what was the point of making him rush away from Jiheon’s absurdly comfortable bed (and away from Jiheon)? 

[ "_To keep up the innocent facade?"_ She had offered the previous night, as they chatted conspiratorially. _"I mean, dad really likes you. But if he had to admit he knows you sleep in the same bed as his little princes he’d be forced to hate you a little bit."   
_ _ "It’s not like I’m creeping in your bed unwanted or trying to do anything weird. So why should he?" _ He argued back.  
_“For corrupting his baby!”  
_ He scoffed at the mischievous glint in her eyes. _“I’m pretty sure it’s the other way around, _KKulking_.” ]_

As expected the door opened less than a minute later, but to his surprise, it was Jiheon’s mom. 

Searom smiled kindly, with a glint in her eyes that proved his theory.

“I was going to wake you up, but I see you’re already getting ready.” She said with her nasal, sweet voice.  
“I just woke Jiheon up, I’ll wait for you guys downstairs.” 

Hyeongjun gave her a smile he knew was kind of awkward.

“And think about what you want for lunch, okay?” She added as she was about to leave.

From the open door, he could spy Jiheon still sitting on her bed and grinned happily as their eyes met from across the floor.

**

Hyeongjun scoffed at the phone, cursing Minhee for being unpredictable as always.

They were supposed to go to the movies together but the weirdo decided he preferred a three hours drive to visit a Science Museum for a biology exposition.

He stopped at the usual park to catch a breath and decide if he truly was heading home.

Technically he could call uncle Seungwoo and drop by the Han’s, to check on Dongpyo. He felt sort of bad for his friend. Getting sick during summer was the worst and they hadn’t seen each other in days. Dongpyo was so sickly and tired he refused all his calls and barely even texted him.

Hyeongjun stared at his bag for a second and felt the sweat starting to wet grossly his curly hair.

_ Nah, I’m not walking all the way to see Dongpyo and I’m definitely not taking any overcrowded bus._

He passed a hand through his hair trying to somewhat dry his forehead, grabbed his stuff and started walking.

Hyeongjun quickly glanced at his watch. 

It was barely 3 pm, meaning that his father was probably still in the gym cleaning up before his 4 pm dance class and cursed to himself remembering he didn’t have the keys of the main door on him.

He took big strides up the slightly sloping driveway that lead to his house small front yard and slowly made his way around, squeezing himself in the little path between the house and the tool shed to get to the small backdoor his dad always forgot to lock.

_“-it’s in two weeks Hangyul!”_

Hyeongjun froze stiffly on his way to the kitchen and a part of him told him to be glad that the backdoor didn’t have a bell. He squinted trying to hear better.

_“Oh, really? Wow, Yohan I had no idea.”_ Replied his dad’s familiar voice. 

It wasn’t a tone he was used to hearing, it was sarcastic, but not in the usual teasing, fun way. He sounded distressed.

Hyeongjun knew immediately he wasn’t supposed to be listening to the conversation like that. He quietly put down his bag and inched closer without making any sound.

_“Well, with the way you’re acting you don’t seem to realise it, to be honest.” _

His godfather seemed distressed too, _strange_. 

Uncle Yohan was like him, the happy go lucky kind, he didn’t get angry. _Were they fighting?_

His dad didn’t reply and Hyeongjun had to fight the urge to walk in and see what was happening. 

Before he could take a step forward, Yohan spoke again.

_“Look, I could get it back in spring. You’re not the first single dad that doesn’t know how to tell his kid he has a fling-“_

_ “Younie hyung is not a fling.”_ Hissed his dad.

_“-but it’s been six months since then. Hell, it’s been three months since you guys started planning, when are you going to tell Junie about it?”_

Hyeongjun had a bad feeling about this. _They were talking about him. And about a fling?_

_ His dad had a girlfriend? No, dad said hyung… A boyfriend then?_

He was supposed to be happy right?

_“I don’t know, okay. Just… just not right now.”_

_ “Then when?”_ Insisted Yohan, his voice rising towards the end in frustration.

_“When they’ll show up by your doorstep?”_

_“I know, I know, Yohan, okay? I-“_ His dad took a deep breath, probably pinching his nose bridge.

_ “I don’t think he's ready yet, it’s been so little since-“_ Hyeongjun heard a familiar pained sigh, his dad did that on particular occasions.

_What does mom have to do with this?_

_“It’s been five years Hangyul.”_ Yohan’s voice was nothing but a whisper and he could barely hear him, but Hyeongjun had expected his uncle’s answer so he didn’t need much imagination to work out the sentence.

_ “You don’t have to remind me.”_ Said his dad firmly, ice in his voice. “_I’m just scared that the change will be too much for him.”_

_ “And for you.”_ Answered in the same tone Hyeongjun’s godfather.

“_I love Seungyoun.”_ His dad’s voice was defensive and offended and Hyeongjun really didn’t know what to make of the conversation.

_ “I’m not saying you don’t.”_ The sixteen years old could picture the man shrug.

_“I want to do it. Really Yohan, I do.”_ There was a tinge of desperation in his father’s voice and that worried Hyeongjun deeply. 

His dad was strong and rarely ever let bad emotions take him off guard.  
_“I just… I’m happy. In a way I haven’t been since… her.”_ His dad’s voice seemed so sad.

_ “And I feel guilty. I’m scared he won’t be happy and the truth is-”_

He heard another deep sigh and the sound of a chair being moved. 

_ “The truth is that even if Hyeongjun won’t take it well, and I just know he won’t take it well, I still want to do it. I want to be selfish and do it.”_

Hyeongjun felt a sudden wave of sadness hit him and had to blink away a few tears.

Another chair moved and something told him his uncle Yohan had probably stood up to hug his dad.

_“You’re right and I get it. But you’ll never know how Junie will react and you delayed this long enough. You have to tell him sooner or later.”_ He said kindly.

_ “It’s better to do it now. Give him the next two weeks to wrap his head around it and hope for the best. Maybe make them know each other.”_

He heard the sound of footsteps getting a bit further away and without realising he followed them.

_“I can’t. Hyeongjun will take some time to process it and I told Seungyoun and Dohyon he knew and was thrilled to have them around.”_

Yohan chuckled bitterly and patted the other on the back. 

_“So wow, you’re really planning on making them meet the day before?”_

Hyeongjun was spying from the hallway and could see his dad groan opening the front door.

_“Yeah I know I’m an idiot.”_

_“Please tell Hyeongjun as soon as you can, though”_ pressed once again Yohan. _“Dongpyo found the invitation in his dad’s office three days ago and refuses to see your son saying it’s his duty as a best friend _to spill the tea _if they see each other._”

Hyeongjun frowned and heard his own thoughts spoken from his father’s lips.

_ “So the flu is fake?”_

Yohan laughed a little, tho now that they were out of the house the sound was barely audible.

_“Locked himself in the house thinking it’ll help keep the secret.”_

The moment they left he ran up the stair looking for something to prove him right.

**

Hyeongjun heard his dad unlock the door at exactly 18.30. 

It was a Thursday night, which meant aunt Chorong was in charge of closing hours and dad could come home right after his advanced dance class.

He didn’t move from his spot even after hearing his dad call form him. He just stared at the little box in his hands and forced the confused tears that threatened to pool in his eyes back in. 

He felt so… _lost_.

“Hey Kid, I’ve been calling for-“ His dad stopped mid-sentence, freezing at the doorway to the main bedroom. The room he used to share with his wife. With Hyeongjun’s mom.

Hyeongjun looked up to see his dad’s face pale in realisation as he took in the sight of his son holding the small burgundy ring box.

“You know dad, I’m pretty sure that in this case the ring is not supposed to stay in here.” He tried to joke, but his voice sounded strained.

“Hyeongjun... I”

Hyeongjun didn’t think he could handle it, not really, not if his dad had that look of guilt and tragedy fixed on his face.

“So tell me about it.” He said as cheerily and excitedly as possible.

“I mean I knew you were seeing someone.” _I had no idea. How could I be so blind?_  
“But to the point of wanting to propose to him…” He lied as naturally as he could hoping his smile wouldn’t falter.

“Actually, I won’t be proposing.” muttered his dad slowly, coming to sit next to him.

“I didn’t know how to bring it up to you. I wanted to, I just”

Hyeongjun nodded in understanding, even if he really couldn’t. “It’s okay dad. Actually, I already know I think…I heard you earlier, with uncle Yohan.” 

His dad frowned in confusion, but the sixteen-year-old shook his head signaling him it didn’t really matter. 

“His name is Seungyoun. We’ve known each other for a long, long time.”

If he thought hard enough, Hyeongjun actually had heard the name more than once. _An old friend uncle Seungwoo would sometimes mention?_

“And we… we love each other. He said that at this point in his life he doesn’t want to waste any more time.” 

His dad reached to grab the box from his hands and opened it. 

“And I thought he was right, so I agreed.”

Hyeongjun laughed without really knowing why. 

Maybe it was because the situation was too strange to be real. His dad was going to get married. Again.

His dad smiled, his face slowly losing the lines of worry etched on his forehead, mistaking his son’s reaction for one of happiness.

_It’s better if he thinks like that,_ thought Hyeongjun.

He reached to take the ring from the box and slipped it on his dad’s finger.

“I’m happy … for you.” He hoped his dad didn’t notice the physical need his son had in emphasising that he was happy for him.  
_Am I happy for myself though? For mom?_

It was a selfish thought he tried to shake off as his dad told him the details of the wedding.

Maybe it was better that it was in only two weeks. _Less time to overthink._

Hyeongjun’s smile was so plastic he was actually really proud of himself for acting so well. But maybe his dad only saw what he wanted at this point. 

He tried not to be bitter. His dad had all the reasons and rights to do this.  
Hyeongjun, if he truly loved his dad, was simply going to have to get used to the idea.

Getting used to having a younger brother.  
Do-something, that really liked music and was a little awkward, but really cute.   
But not cuter than Hyeongjun, insisted his dad.

Getting used to the fact that unless he wanted them to share a room - _he truly didn’t_ \- one of them was going to have to use the old hobby room/office.  
It was going to be him, he decided, because there was no way in heaven or hell that he’d let anyone close to his mom’s old things.

Getting used to the idea that he was going to have a new…   
He didn’t like the sound of it. He wasn’t going to call him that.   
Getting used to the idea that his dad had a new spouse.   
That was better.

Getting used to the idea that the left side of the cabinet, the part his mom used to occupy and that up to this day his dad used very reluctantly, was going to be put to use once again.

Getting used to being more than just two people at breakfast and dinner, yet none of them would be his mom, but new members of the family.   
_Strangers_.

He squeezed his dad’s hand, laughed when it seemed appropriate and smiled when his dad looked at him. 

As they cooked dinner side to side he thought of how in less than a month they were going to be twice as many people.  
_How would that influence their pace? Their lives?_

He liked how things were now. Just the two of them. 

The only addition he liked was when they had friends over and that usually only lasted a few nights at best.  
The only permanent addition to their family he wanted was his mom. And there was no way she’d come back. 

He sighed.

_Be positive. Sure, they’re not mom. You’ll have a new dad and a new brother. _

Said a small voice in his head.

_But I don’t want them,_ he replied.

_Yeah, but dad does._

Fought back the voice in his head.

He felt both disappointment in himself and frustration towards his dad gather in the pit of his stomach and felt himself speak up.

“Dad I’ll go to the Beak’s after dinner.” He said understanding what he wanted to do only as he said it.

“I’ll sleep there, I think. I forgot a few things, a few clothes, my toothbrush. I’ll be back tomorrow.”

His dad frowned but nodded nonetheless a resigned look in his eyes.

**

Hyeongjun didn’t take his phone along. 

Risky and stupid. He could already picture it: _sixteen-year-old mugged and left for dead._

His dad always told him to never roam the streets alone and without a way to contact him, but he knew that if he had his phone he’d be calling Dongpyo now and demand explanations.

So Hyeongjun just left it at home to avoid any unnecessary fight that would probably leave him feeling even worse than he already did.

He could understand, really. 

After a few hours from hearing the news, he understood why Pyo thought it was better to go hide and keep it all from his best friend, but still, a part of him felt betrayed.

Seungwoo and Yohan knew, Dongpyo knew.  
He was sure a lot of people at the gym knew because dad kept saying he was going to Seoul for work even if his work didn’t really require him to.

Hyeongjun felt like such an idiot.

Did Minhee know? Or Minhee’s parents?

At that moment it felt as if everyone was in on this sick joke, except for him. 

_What an idiot he was,_ he thought as he kicked small pebbles along the street.

He had wanted to breathe fresh air and leave the house so much and so eagerly he didn’t even think of calling beforehand.

But it didn’t matter, what was important was that he wasn’t in the house and it helped him stay away from mental images that seemed a lot like dad forgetting about _her_. Or about _him_.

Hyeongjun was under her balcony before he even knew it and thought it was ridiculous how he was willing to do this.  
But it felt like the only thing he wanted to do. The only place he wanted to be, with the only person he wanted to hear.

He searched the ground to find something suitable, something big enough to be thrown but small enough not to break her window. 

There was loud music coming from the living room and high pitched laughter that meant both Mr. and Mrs. Baek were home.

He threw a pebble and then another one and it actually felt kinda good that he was almost disappointed to see a silhouette walking towards the balcony.

The curly teenager was suddenly blinded by a strong light and had to squint to see better.

Jiheon was in the same pj’s she had the night before, holding her phone to illuminate the garden.  
He could imagine goosebumps breaking on her skin due to the night breeze. 

He couldn’t see her face that well, but he could clearly hear her hiss.

_ “The fuck Hyeongjun? What are you doing down there?” _

He laughed genuinely and couldn't care less if her parents found him now, hearing her voice was already making him feel better.

He looked around hoping to find the metal ladder he swore he saw the other day and maybe the universe didn’t hate him as much as he thought 'cause it was just casually laying on the side of the house.

He positioned the ladder on the sturdy tree that reached up to Jiheon’s room and made his way up slowly, carefully trying not to slip from the small, slippery pegs.

He thanked his mom for forcing him to take climbing classes with Somi when he was younger and felt his girlfriend’s disapproving gaze on him.

As he stepped down on her balcony, he found her with her arms crossed and with a deep frown on her face.

“Hey, I just climbed a tree for you,” he chuckled taking her face in his hands. “is this the way to greet me?”

She huffed but didn’t move away. “What are you even doing here, Hyeongjun?”

He shrugged and moved inside, feeling at home in the large, cozy and very _Jiheon_ room.

“I wanted to see my girlfriend.” He answered truthfully.

“You could have just rung the bell.” She scoffed. “It’s not like my parents would have kicked you out.”

He sighed and stopped to look at her.

_Fuck, she really did make everything better._ He thought, feeling all the insecurities resurfacing, yet ready to let them out. 

He could do it here, with her. He could let the facade slip and be honest to himself.

“I… I didn’t want to see anyone else- ” He said softly.

“Really?” She said a little put off not facing him.  
“'Cause I called you twice in the afternoon and you didn’t answer my texts all day.”

Hyeongjun felt everything rush back to him, remembering the reason he ignored the missed calls and unanswered texts.

“I feel like you’re the only one I can rely on, right now.” He replied, his voice breaking a little mirroring the heaviness in his chest.

She spun around promptly, hearing the tone of his voice, and he saw her face morph into one of worry and surprise. 

“_Babe_…” she said instinctively taking a step forward.

Hyeongjun opened his arms, feeling it was the only thing he had the strength to do.

He closed his eyes trapping her in his embrace and felt her grip on him tighten, grounding him to reality.

They ended up on the bed, but he didn't know if it was before or after he started crying. He just knew that a certain point he could feel Jiheon kissing his cheeks, drying his tears before caressing his furrowed brows.

Her delicate fingers slowly smoothed the pained lines that were twisting his features and when his breathing calmed down he opened his eyes to find her eyes staring, moist and empathetic, a line on her forehead marking her worry.

Hyeongjun scooted closer to take her back in his arms and breathed in the comfort and affection that her body emanated.

“Babe,” she started tentatively “what happened? Do you wanna talk about it?”

He sighed placing a kiss on her hair. “Maybe in the morning, right now I just need you here.”

She tightened her grip and left a soft kiss on his collar bone. 

“Don’t worry. Whatever it is, we’ll work on it _together_.”

He drew small circles on her arm finding it helped him relax.

He wondered when did Jiheon had the time to turn off the lights, wondering if he was really sobbing so much he hadn’t noticed her reaching out for the light switch next to her bed.

He caressed her hair, thanking whoever it was up there that made a girl like her be patient and understanding to deal with a guy like him. 

“_Jiheon_?” he whispered.

“Hmm.” She mumbled.

“Thank you… I lo-” he stopped, unsure if it was wise to say it right now, after a breakdown and with her halfway in dreamland. 

He kissed her hair and decided to wait for a better time.

Everything would be okay, difficult and painful, but eventually, it would be okay.  
After all, he had Jiheon to turn to if things got bad.

_Jiheon_.

The incredible Beak Jiheon he loved so fucking much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heyyyyyy! I decided to put everything truly completely angsty on hold until we face better days, I dont think I could write anything too angsty especially if its canon-compliant, i hope you understand.
> 
> Anyways i've been waiting to write this for so long, mostly cause i love writing the jiheon-hyeongjun dynamic since thier plot line is the one i developed the most in my mind (and becasue i love fromis9)
> 
> please tell me what you think about this in the comments!!  
it did turn out sadder than i hoped and i'm kinda sorry but i guess it inevitable, since hyeongjun really isnt cool with the wedding so...
> 
> anyways yeah, thanks for reading and please stay strong!!  
keep hydrated, well-rested and ready to fight for X1, ily one its <3

**Author's Note:**

> heya!  
this is actually one of the first fics i ever started drafting for x1 and i'm v v v attatched to this.  
I honestly update randomly and far apart so sorry in advance. 
> 
> But if you do have the patience to sit through this, buckle up. I plan to make this a roller coaster of emotions and family drama. 
> 
> Kudos and Comments are always welcome! <3  
tell me what you guys think!
> 
> ps you can find me on twitter @sun_shinejade (lets be friends <3)
> 
> ~~~ also stan x1 fromis_9 and whoever i name drop in this <3 <3 <3


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